Comic 26 - That's not how science works!

That's not how science works!
26th Aug 2011, 10:44 AM in Fail Monsters

Average Rating: 5 (5 votes)
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Author Notes:

Gryphon 26th Aug 2011, 10:44 AM edit delete
I've been known to shout, "That's not how [x] works!" at people when they're doing science wrong.

x = therodynamics "Perpetual motion is real, man! The government just keeps it from the public." I don't care how hard you rub that lamp, buddy, there's no genie. And even if you had a perfect system with no decay of energy, what would you do with it? It's not like you can extract energy without diminishing the system.

x = quantum physics "And if you wear this magnet and copper quantum bracelet, you'll be healthier, happier, and more attractive. It's quantum physics, and that's proven science." Deepak Chopra is a medical doctor, not a physicist; if your knowledge of quantum physics came from him, it's iffy at best. You're not using real science, and you're barely using real words in a meaningful manner. If you're right, though, I don't even need your bracelet - I'll just wish my way to riches.


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Lee V. 26th Aug 2011, 11:23 AM edit delete reply
Lee V.
I wish light bulbs worked that way. That would be awesome.

Useless maybe, but still awesome.
Gryphon 26th Aug 2011, 3:41 PM edit delete reply
Nah, it could be useful. Lightbulbs normally emit light+heat, but screwed in backwards they emit dark+cool. On a hot day, you could regain the comfortable use of your outdoor living spaces with a few floodlights wired up backwards for shade!
Lee V. 26th Aug 2011, 3:59 PM edit delete reply
Lee V.
But if they work the opposite, then they wouldn't really be emitting dark+cool. They'd just be sucking in all of the light+heat.

Then they'd be like miniature black holes...they would just keep growing and growing...eventually engulfing the world and everything on it.

That's not very useful.
BishopFrenzy 8th Sep 2011, 2:43 PM edit delete reply
But wouldn't they also provide energy instead of requiring it? Converting light and heat into electricity! Sounds handy to me. :D
Lee V. 8th Sep 2011, 2:53 PM edit delete reply
Lee V.
Wait...isn't that how solar cells work?
Gryphon 8th Sep 2011, 3:42 PM edit delete reply
The don't make it darker or cooler. Plus, when you dig into the deep of it, they're remarkably inefficient, expensive to make, and can be a little on the toxic side.
Lee V. 8th Sep 2011, 3:52 PM edit delete reply
Lee V.
I was referring to the converting light into energy part. :P

But plants do it better anyway. Plus you can use the big ones for shade - dark+cool.
Jrade 26th Aug 2011, 4:23 PM edit delete reply
Oh, those damn bracelets...
ThornsInOurSide 26th Aug 2011, 9:23 PM edit delete reply
How come he always has those dark circles under his eyes? Is he addicted to crack?
Gryphon 26th Aug 2011, 9:30 PM edit delete reply
It's pigmentation. But yes, also the crack.
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